WWFD!?

We had such a great Saturday night celebrating my Dad's 60th Birthday! Thank you to all who could make it. We managed to totally surprise him, which made it so much more fun. He had NO CLUE. He walked into the bar and when we yelled surprise he turned around to see if someone was behind him. Totally shocked! It was great.

There were close to 50 people who came and it was a great to spend time with family who we don't get to see very often and meet some of his work guys and NASCAR buddies.

We gave out koozies as party favors (what could be more approproiate for my Dad!?)

The theme of the party seemed to be WWFD? As in, What Would Frank Do? To explain what that meant, we placed little notes in each koozie that read the following:

We are so thankful to you all for coming to celebrate 60 years of being Frank! It is so hard to believe that Dad is 60 and a Grandfather! We have a hard time keeping up with him…the man never stops! Hiking in Bar Harbor he is always the leader of the pack and nothing ever slows him down. The three of us girls have always had such high expectations of any guy that came into our life. Whether it was fixing, building or cooking something no one ever seemed to do it like Dad could, so much so that on a camping trip with the three of us girls and a bunch of friends, we came up with the phrase WWFD or What Would Frank Do? It became a phrase that we commonly used around the DeMarco household. With two of us now married and one engaged, the phrase still comes up once in a while, but we think we all did a pretty good job of marrying men who meet our expectations of what a guy should be able to do based on our Dad. So next time you find yourself struggling with a problem, ask yourself “WWFD?”

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DAD! We love you with all our hearts and thank you for being the best father a girl (and Finn) could ask for!

Love,
Your Girls

Dad and his girls.

Alec had chemo last Friday and things went well. While there, I got to meet Caitlin and Brian's new baby, Georgia who was born on 1/26. On our way home we stopped and met Lyss and Steve's baby, Sofia, born on 1/20. They are both perfect little angels! I had this moment of...wow, that little person was just in a belly, then it is dressed in clothes and taken home and a whole new life begins. It really is a miracle. My old manager and his wife also had a baby girl named Stella last week on 1/27. I do believe the Baby Boom for 2011 has begun! Congrats to all of the families! Next up is Catherine and Jay due in April!

Alec is feeling OK, just dealing with the usual side effects of chemo. It didn't stop him from finishing up the crown molding on the new door, going out and having fun Saturday night or ice fishing all yesterday. Some how I was out ice fishing Sunday too, it seemed warm when we left in the morning, but the wind was terrible. Alec's sisters came with us and we did have a good time, but I did not leave the ice shack. I was in there all day. When I got bored I asked him to keep us entertained, and he sure did. He and Tam put on a sort of a puppet show from the outside of the shack while Charlotte and I laughed our frozen butts off. And, no, we did not even catch a single fish, nor did we have a lousy bite.

Alec pretending to stab Tam with a sword, see what we have to do to keep ourselves entertained up here in Maine!!!



I woke up this morning and saw the weather report for the week, and what do you know? Another flippin snow storm! (I only use words like flippin when I am REALLY MAD). We were planning on leaving for Florida Wednsday morning at 6 am, when I saw the report I almost had a melt down. I seriously never get riled up over stuff like this, I mean in the scheme of things, its so small. But COME ON! GIVE US A BREAK! I did NOT have a good morning, I was sulking and feeling so mad and knew our flight would be cancelled. I called Jet Blue and asked about flights during a snow storm. The rep said as soon as we saw on the website "winter advisory" to call and we could change our flights for free. I had both Jill and Alec checking the website (I was working and without internet). As soon as it came up both called me and I changed the flight for tomorrow at 6:00am!!! WOOHOO! I was so happy, now, if the snow would just hold off until 7 or so we can get out of here! I have been checking the weather in Pompano Beach for the past 10 days, bought some new clothes and to even think that we would be stuck in the airport could have put me in a mental institute. Go figure, after all that we have gone through that is what almost did me in.

We are off to Florida (God willing) tomorrow and coming back in a week. No laptops, no email, just some SUN and virgin pina cool-adas. Thank you again to John and Katie for hooking us up, we are SO LUCKY and SO THANKFUL.

Thank you all for your love and prayers, especially the last few weeks. Every prayer, email, card, text, call, means so much. It is what keeps us going. Erin sent us a card today and she quoted Robert Schuller;

"Impossible situations can become possible miracles"

Love,

Heather, Alec
Millie and Bam

Walls are coming down...

Brrrr....we are trying to stay warm up here! I sure am thankful for one thing, the fact that Alec is not on the chemo where he is sensitive to the cold, I don't think he would have been able to leave the house in the past week! I love that we have so much snow, it looks pretty and we can play in it, but does it have to be so COLD!?

We have been skiing almost every day and we try to stay active. Saturday my Mom and Jill came up for some xcountry skiing. Alec left us in the dust, he actually finished 30 minutes before us! Saturday night we had a night out on the town in Portland with Alec's best buddies, John and Jaime and a few of their friends. We really enjoyed getting out of the house for a change and hanging out with good friends and good pizza!

Staying busy is most important, especially after receiving some not so good news and during these long winter days. I often think of that movie, The Shining when the harsh winter sets in! Alec and I can only entertain each other for so long, and without my second most loving companion, red wine, I am going a little crazy! Although, I am counting down the days until we leave for Florida...a week from tomorrow! And, I check the weather every day, a toasty 77 for the day we arrive!

I finally won a little battle, and Alec is letting the walls come down once again. After our kitchen renovation, there was still a wall that blocked our living room to the kitchen and we all know that having an open kitchen is ideal. Especially with a little one on the way :) I think that is what did it for Alec, he did not like the idea of connecting the rooms, (probably because I am always in the kitchen yapping on the phone and with a door he will be able to hear everything) but knowing that we would need to keep an eye on the baby and that doorway would allow us to do so, it was a no brainer. We did compromise, he wanted a door, so we decided on a glass door, just like some of the other doors in the house. So yes, he can still shut me out, but not completely! The only downfall to the door...he can see me munching on my secret candy stash.

Other than that....I LOVE it! It makes the "walk" from the living room to the kitchen so easy, we don't have to go all the way around the house! And, I can easily talk to Alec from the kitchen, rather than walking around or yelling. Even though I loved my new kitchen, it could get lonely cooking all by myself, even with my new TV. (Can you tell I HATE being alone?!) We just put the hole in the wall Sunday, and it is taking some getting use to, we both find ourselves walking the "long way" every once and a while. Alec has been working hard to put the new door frame up and then will have to match the trim work as well. But it looks fabulous so far and I cant wait for it to be finished!
Here are some photos...

Kitchen wall before...

Living room wall before...

Alec cutting out the door. I even learned how to use the reciprocating saw and cut some holes myself!

But mostly I vacuumed up the mess and took pictures.

And then there was light!!!! I was so excited to see the first ray of light come through!

Luckily, plumbing was not too much of a problem, we were afraid that the toilet pipes would be in the way and we would have to call the plumber which would be very expensive. There was a pipe, but Alec just moved the hole over about an inch and we did not have any issues. The plumber is coming on Monday to remove the base board but that's all we need him for.



A cleaned up picture with a custom door frame

It makes our house feel so much bigger!!

My favorite part, I am sitting on the couch and this is my new view!

I love it! I am so happy, and Alec is too. He admitted the other day that although he doesnt always agree at first, that I, and of course Katie Mogul, my go-to-girl for all things interior design, are usually right about this stuff. Ahh....thank you!

I will post the final pictures once he is finished. I just sit here on the couch and stare at it. Then I walk in through the new doorway and say "why hello kitchen!". Yes, I am a dork.

I have been feeling Bam move so much latley, we can actually see it from the outside, which is totally weird, almost like there is an alien in there! And, I think I am getting larger by the day, my large ski jacket is barely able to zip up, I suppose my hot fudge Sunday every night may have something to do with it :) Catherine, who is a few weeks ahead of me said she feels like Chris Farley, yeah, that sounds about right!

Alecs second round of chemo is this Friday, not the best way to end a week. Once we get back from Florida we will be back to infusion on Tuesdays, not a great way to start the week either! We just pray every night that the chemo will work and that a miracle will happen. We know God is by our sides and our spirit will not be broken.

Thank you all for the prayers and for reaching out to us. It means so much and we are so blessed. We would literally be lost without you.

Love,

Heather, Alec, Millie & Bam

Once you chose HOPE, anything is possible.

Nothing like a little Julia to brighten our day! Last weekend Tina and Julia came up on Sunday to hang out, and she sure did cheer us up! She is getting such a personality and kept kissing Millie and Alec, she would pucker up and walk over to Alec and wanted to give him kiss after kiss! Millie was a bit more shy and skeptical of this little walking, talking doll, but by the end of the day she knew if she stayed close to Julia, she might just get lucky with a dropped snack.

We are hanging in there, Alec's first chemo wasnt too bad, he was tired but not tired enough to stop him from cross country skiing on Saturday or getting up at 5 am Sunday for some ice fishing. I just know if anyone can beat this, its Alec. He is not your ordinary guy, there is something in him that makes him a fighter, both mentally and physically. I am still so sure that we will get through this. Every day seems to get a little easier and we are once again rebuilding our strength and faith.

Amy sent us this quote, and it could not be more true!

"What lies behind us and what lies before us are small matters compared to what lies within us" - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Thank you to all our friends and family for reaching out to us. Sometimes I just dont want to talk about things, I get tired of being a debbie downer with bad news and I want to be my normal, happy, self. Speaking of happy, we are so excited for Lyss and Steve who welcomed little Sofia Christina into the world today! She is just precious and it is miracles like that which keep us believing and we know there a God who is very Good!

Sarah sent me this quote yesterday that I loved:

"Once you choose HOPE, anything is possible" - Christopher Reeves

Thank you again for your prayers and support, we could not get through this without you!

Love,

Heather, Alec, Millie
& Bam

Here are some pictures of Julia, I tried to capture her kisses, but my camara phone was too slow!

Unbroken

Here we go again.

So much for starting 2011 with some "good news". Dr. Allen called Alec yesterday and delivered some not so good results from his last PET scan and gave us the heads up that he would be starting chemo Friday afternoon.

It once again felt like we were kicked in the stomach and life became so fragile. We sat there holding each other, trying to find the right words. After a few moments, we pulled it together, strapped on our skis and went for a night ski through the woods. Nothing like clearing your head and sorting out your feelings while breathing in the fresh Maine air. We got a little lost, confused in the trails and in the dark. To be honest, it was a welcomed feeling, I would have rather been lost out there all night worrying about finding our way out rather than dealing with what we had lying ahead of us.

Today we had a 3:00 appointment with Dr. Allen. After about 40 minutes and 50 questions, we were feeling a little better. She said not to "lose hope yet" and that we have every reason to keep fighting. She showed us the spots on his liver and lungs and they are small, but they are there. She and Dr. Ferrone were shocked to see the spread and to confirm that it truly is colorectal cancer, they are doing another biopsy, (because it is that unusual that they want to be absolutely sure it is not the lymphoma.) We showed her our ultrasound picture of the baby and as we were walking out she said "thank you, for sharing that picture with me". We know and trust in all our hearts that she and the rest of the team here are fighting for us and will literally do anything to save Alec's life.

We went on up to see Katie, the best nurse ever. She called me last night and said "I am not worried yet, its not the end of the world". I do not know what I would do without Katie, she makes us laugh and keeps us going. Alec and I talked about chemo nurses on the way home tonight, they truly are special people to be able to do what they do. They care about their patients SO MUCH and when we get bad news or have a bad day, so do they. It must be so hard to become so close with your patients, they feel our pain and I am sure it must be hard to shake when they go home to their own families.

Alec is on a new treatment called FO-FURI or something like that. Dr. Allen took out the oxyplatin since Alec has bad nueropothy in his hands and feet (a numbness where he cant even tell if his feet are cold and if it gets worse can cause serious problems). The problem with chemo is it can only work for so long, as smart as chemo is, cancer is smarter and will eventually find a way to overcome the chemo. Mixing it up will hopefully trick the cancer and stop it from spreading for at least a few months. So lets see what this FURY stuff can do...I like the name of it anyways. Katie said that one of her patients has been on this regimen for 36 months and is doing well, we need to hear these stories.

Now, if I told you we had so much fun at chemo, you probably would not believe me. But its true, the nurses all come in, tease Alec, he teases them, or me, we tell them the funny things we have done or said and we all end up laughing our way through treatment. Amazing isn't it!? The entire ride home we danced in the car, he even had a "break it down" dance session to "Funky Cold Medina". I don't know if we were loopy from the emotional rollarcoaster we had been on the past 24 hours, or are we just plain nutty? Either way we made each other laugh and laugh. After I sang to him one of my favorites (because it really reminds me of us, since Alec made me quit hard alcohol) "You ain't much fun since I quit drinking" by Toby Keith, that song I had wrote about after surgery that came on during the drive home from MGH "Hello World". God Wink? I think so!

To get this news is so devastating. We were due for something positive and we were really hopeful that 2011 was going to be "our year". We certainly still have so much to look forward to and a few more chances for some good news, but it just seems like with each obstacle our light at the end of that tunnel gets further and dimmer. We simply have to believe and hope for a miracle. After listening to the doctors try to explain how Gabrielle Giffords survived a gun shot to the head, they summed it up in a few words; sometimes, there is no medical explanation, it simply is a miracle. And this is so true. There are so many unknowns so many medical mysteries that you can only look at the obvious...prayers DO work and miracles CAN happen.

We both refuse to let cancer get the best of us. I made Alec promise me he would not give up. This disease will NOT break us. We have so much to live for now, its not just about the 2 of us anymore, we have someone else we must continue fighting for.

Right before we fell asleep last night he whispered to me "We gotta keep the faith Heath". Enough said.

So, once again, we ask for your prayers. We know with the power of prayer and with God, all things are possible.

Thank you for your prayers and support and for reaching out to us. It means so much and we could not get through this without you all.

All our Love,

Heather, Alec, Millie
& Bam :)

Is it SUMMER yet?

Is it me or is winter dragging by? I know its only the second week in January, but I am already longing for Spring and Summer. Snowboarding was really the only thing we had to do up here in winter, and since I was always falling hard on my butt, I am forced to take the season off. All that's left to do is ice fish...boring. I spent the afternoon yesterday making sauce and meatballs, that was pretty much the highlight of my weekend. Alec went ice fishing at Long Pond (the one next to West Pond) with Tom again yesterday, but he couldn't drag me out of bed. Ice fishing can be fun when you drink more than a few beers, but that is also something I cant do for a while.

Today was a beautiful day, and we went to church, which is always nice, we went for a couple walks then gave Millie a much needed bath....she was stinky! We may need a new hobby or something, last year I had started training for the marathon with my sisters, could I possibly miss those long runs!? Of course I am not complaining, (maybe I am just a little) I would surely rather be pregnant in the winter than summer (I cant even think about bathing suits with my pot belly!) But with no snowboarding, no running and no drinking beers, it makes for a very long winter weekend! We did however, book a week in Florida, thanks to Alec's mom who bought us tickets for Christmas, and also Jon and Katie for again offering their condo to us, we are literally counting down the days...24 more! (But still wont be wearing a bathing suit!)

We both love to cross country ski, but we hardly have any snow up here! Hard to believe that two years in a row Boston has more snow than Maine. OK, enough of my whining, but I am ready for summer. In fact, I had a dream last night we were out on the boat tuna fishing with my Papa, oh if only dreams were sometimes true!


First (and only...so far) fish of the season! Yummy dinner.

Today, while giving Millie a bath, I couldn't help but take her picture. She HATES bath time, she gets embarrassed. So naturally, I had to take out my camera and capture the moment. It reminded me of when she was a puppy, and Alec gave her first bath and how she hated that too...





Alec had a PET scan last week, and we are patiently waiting to hear results. The word scan gives me butterflies in my stomach, I can hardly even say it. There should be an appointment this week with Dr. Allen, to talk about results and next steps. It has been so nice to have this time off from cancer, we are not looking forward to getting back to reality. I am just praying to God for strength and courage to get through whatever the next battle may be. I know that HE can not change results or circumstances, HE can only carry us through those difficult times.

Please say a prayer for us this week. We are cautiously optimistic, Alec feels and looks so darn good, it would be hard to believe otherwise.

Thank you for the prayers and support, lets hope we start 2011 out with some good news!

All our love,

Heather, Alec, Millie & Bam :)

Where there is GREAT LOVE there are ALWAYS MIRACLES! -Willa Cather

Seeing how I keep talking about how we have SO MUCH to look forward to in 2011, I should probably officially announce exactly what I am referring to. Although most of you know, there are those who we don't get to see or talk to that often. I have been wanting to wait until each milestone before I posted, but after the last appointment, I feel pretty sure about things.


Alec and I are expecting a baby in May! We are absolutely thrilled, we have never felt such joy and happiness and now Alec has so much more to continue fighting for. We are going to be parents and I truly believe there is no greater gift. I have never felt more blessed and happy, it gives us Hope and helps us again believe in miracles.


This was not something we took lightly, we did not just wake up one morning and decide to have a baby. We prayed to God, talked to each other and sought advice from family and friends. In our hearts we knew it was the right decision. We have said since day one that nothing is going to stop us from living our lives to the fullest and we refuse to let cancer make these decisions for us.


Alec's doctors had advised us over a year ago to think about our future and children. When one goes through this much chemo, radiation and surgery, there is always a danger in conceiving a child and we were told to freeze his sperm. Fast forward to July of 2010, and we started the IVF cycle. To go through the IVF process and experience baby making from such a scientific point of view was just amazing. The doctor gave us a photo of the 2 embryos, just a couple clusters of cells, to think this is how life begins is incredible. I was in total awe of the entire process. Although having a baby through IVF does require an exact science, it comes down to one thing and thing only...a miracle. There was a waiting period of 10 days and while Alec was so calm and patient, I was not. I again turned to God and knew that if this was meant to be, it would be. On day 10, the nurse was to call Alec with the results. I went to pick him up from chemo that day and by the smile on his face when I walked in, I knew what the results were...a miracle indeed.


Alec and I are so thrilled and I know that this will forever change our lives in a way that is unimaginable. We can not wait. I believe in all my heart that we have made the best decision and that no matter what, our baby will be loved unconditionally. I know that Alec is going to be such an amazing father. He has every quality that you want in a Dad, he is over protective, sensitive, sweet, a little strict, patient, and has such a great sense of humor and a big heart with so much love to give. We decided not to find out whether its a boy or a girl. There are so few surprises in life that we think this will be the biggest and most exciting. He named the baby "Bam" (only until May) so rather than calling the baby "it" we call it Bam. Alec also chose the names and we both agreed on the name Chase Alexander for a boy and Annabelle Hope if its a girl! I always thought that I would want to wait until I saw the baby before naming it, because I thought "what if it doesn't look like a Chase?" But to be honest, I think all babies look the same I don't see myself thinking "oh he looks more like a Joe than a Chase".


I am very lucky in that I have had such an easy pregnancy with no morning sickness, no exhaustion, and no symptoms, to the point that I can hardly tell I am pregnant. That is until I tried on my Seven jeans the other night, the ones that used to be loose and I couldn't get them past my thighs! Alec stood there laughing at me. Not funny! OK, it is a little funny. Then Jill on Sunday saying "no you don't look fat at all, you look pregnant" but 10 minutes later she added "Gosh, I am afraid to see what my butt is going to look like when I am pregnant!" I was like...."uh what the heck is that supposed to mean! ??"


We are trying to enjoy the quiet weekends of not doing much since we know this will be the last time we can sleep in on a Sunday morning. The time has already flown by and May will be here before we know it. There are so many babies coming in 2011, which makes it a lot of fun, to be able to compare with all my girlfriends. Tina and Bob are also expecting their 2nd 5 days after my due date of 5/19!!! My parents will have 2 new grand babies in a matter of days!


Alec and I are very grateful to the team at Boston IVF who were absolutely amazing. I would recommend them to everyone and we thank them for helping us create our little miracle. I cant wait to go back (maybe summer 2012!?) and do it again.


We will continue fighting the good fight and Bam gives us all the more reason to never, never give up HOPE! Thank you all for the continued love, support and prayers!


Love always,


Heather, Alec, Millie and Bam :)

So long 2010!

Happy New Year! I have never looked forward to a new year beginning as I did 2011. After Battling 2 cancers, 3 surgeries and months and months of chemo and radiation, we are both very glad to say goodbye to 2010. Of course we have many wonderful memories of friends and family (especially over the summer) it is still nice to bring this year to a close. 2011 is going to be our year, I just know it.


We rang in the new year in Portland with my parents. Alec's 35th Birthday was on December 30th (I always feel so bad for people who have December birthdays, especially that close to Christmas!) I had given him tickets to the Bob Marley (yes, he has the same name as Bob the reggae guy) comedy show in Portland on New Years Eve. I have never been to a comedy show and Bob was hilarious, he is from Maine and makes fun of Mainahs, it was wicked funny. We laughed for an hour straight, I was actually a little nervous for Alec since laughing can sometimes still be painful, but he was just fine, after all, laughter is the best medicine!


On New Years Day, he somehow got me out of bed at 7 and we met up with Tom and his girlfriend up at a lake in Poland, Maine for a few hours of ice fishing. Ice fishing is the most boring fishing ever and I was a nervous nelly worrying about the ice not being thick enough. 6 inches just doesn't seem like it would hold that much weight. Alec kept trying to convince me that he could bring his truck out on the ice...I think I would rather not test that theory. We didn't have a single nibble, which makes it even boring-er.


2011 is already off to a great start and we thank you all for being there for us in 2010. We could not have made it through without the love, support and prayers from all our family and friends. We are looking forward to a year filled with HOPE and MIRACLES.

Thank you and here's to a HEALTHY, HAPPY, NEW YEAR!!!

XOXO

Love,

Heather, Alec and Millie